Sunday, March 30, 2014


The endless echo of this existence
Caught amidst the wave of life
Thought creates action
Action creates reality
Yet we are all adrift on this same
Endless sea

Are we connected by the thoughts
Which shape our reality
Are you a life boat
Sent to rescue me

I do not need saving
If I can not swim alone
I would rather drown

But what if we could drift awhile together
Two lone vessels joined by an invisible tether
What then are we but two lost souls
Adrift on the same sea

I will think into reality
I will cast away doubt,shame,pain and leave them in this sea
As the salt and the water
Cleanse this soul to purity

When I reach shore
Then I will know who really was swimming with me
If our life is a product of all we think and see
Let's create a better reality

Thursday, March 27, 2014


An invisible light burning inside
A lifeline
You pull me from the darkness
Tethered souls
Joined long ago
In melancholy
You had been forgot
But you were there all along
Your spark is mine
Mine yours
As I climb I remember
I reach for you
You pull me through
Your face a mystery
Yet I will know you when we meet
Your light is mine
Mine is yours
Joined yet separate
For eternity
Thank you
For being the other half of me
Although it is the half I never see

Wednesday, March 26, 2014


Beauty in chaos
Growth beneath destruction
Easy it is so become trapped
In the ruble of what had beneath

Clear away the pieces
Look deep beneath
Uncover the beauty that remains

Strong enough to stand the fire
Bright enough to adapt
Let the shine flourish that seed

Nourish it
Feed it the love it so deseprately
Even from the most heinous
Hope and the seed of love remains

Tuesday, March 25, 2014


Poison oozes from the fang he calls a tongue
Each word dripped
Arsenic coated lies
He bites at her heart
Time after time
the crazy thing about venom
In high doses it's lethal
But not small doses over time

She wonders if he believes them
The poison coated lies
Or if it's all he knows
Truth escapes his reply

She drinks his doses daily
Quietly at first she cried
One cold black morning
She discovered her heart had died

Now the venom stirs in her blood
Begging release
She thinks she can control it
This poison consuming her veins
Blackened is her heart
Only the light of her soul remains
Sadly it grows dimmer with each passing day

She knows she is welting
But a change is coming too
So many open roads
unsure if which to choose
Afraid the poison has affected her mind
Trying to plan for a better place and time

He nods silently
The passing of each lie coated goodbye
Believing she still loves him
Not knowing that girl died

Becareful of the poison
Keep it out if your blood
Or pay the highest price
The loss of true love

Sunday, March 23, 2014

Turn Table

There was a time I thought I knew you but that was just a dream
A man beneath a mask
Once you removed it
My heart began to scream

The little voice has told me
Warned me all along
You couldn't be trusted
Your love was all wrong

Silenced beneath blind faith
Praying it wasn't too late
All your pretty words
Sealed my hearts fate

Now the voice shakes its head
My once red heart cold and dead
Mask down once more
You want it to be as before

Pitty the fool too blind to see
Reality evades the space between
Your pretty words no longer hypnotize flat are your wasted
Silly little lies

My heart has gone away
There it will safely stay
No more to be excised with the pain of your loves empty lies

Wear your mask
Laugh behind those eyes
Keep on believing
True love never dies
But your heart wasnt true
My eyes once again burn blue
Behind the mask I wear
Making you believe I really care

Saturday, March 22, 2014

Between the Lines

If one dares to read between the lines
stumble they will, upon a truth of another kind
The essence of what the writer feels
Be gentle when judge
It is a window to the world through whence you peer

Thursday, March 20, 2014

Change lanes ahead

The air feels thick
The buzz if an unseen electrical current
Charged to deliver a life altering pulse
It clings to everything
Tangible, yet invisible
Building like a lightning bolt high
In the atmosphere
An awakening
Change is on the horizin
Sweet,terrifying, exciting change
It's source as yet unknown
But its presence is felt
To the bone

Tuesday, March 18, 2014

Timeless Soul

If a soul is infinite
Time is just a landscape
What does the soul find
When it leaves this place
If thought creates reality
Is it belief that dictates

Heaven for a saint,hell for the sinner
A vast nothing
Something bigger

What if thought is all we are
Frozen briefly in a deteriorating form
Once free what we dream
Is all we are

Dream then of grandeur
Oceans vast and deep
Fuzzy kittens and butterfly wings
Dream of love that endures all time
Smiles that hold the magic of sunrise
Dream of passion
pulsating and wild
Create a world without war

If all our current
raw and unstored
Creates the pulse of eternity
Dive deep into the furthest recess of imagination
Pull from the very soul
Create a now that you would
Dream to live
wild, carefree
Forever more

Friday, March 14, 2014

Goodnight Bloodbath

I miss my team. I miss my sport. There are so many deep,fun,amazing people that have graced my life because of Roller Derby. Life has a way of giving us seasons,showing us something greater,and then moving us on.
I don't regret the decision to put my meager finances into my kids future I just wish I could do it all.
We give what we can to those we love.  I am lucky to have had the season while it lasted. The people and sport will always be part of me. For now, I must move on.Here's to memories and hope for better days to come.
Inside of me,my alter ego that is an 8 wheel wearing badass who adores her little fans will always be alive.
I feel like Superman without a cape.
A piece of me is missing I hope one day it comes back.

Thursday, March 13, 2014

My daughters eyes

When pappa leaves and momma cries
I don't know what to do
Of course I've been through this before
More than a time or two
But Pappa doesn't understand
What it takes
To love a woman
So mommas crying again.
I try to laugh
Try to smile
It always makes momma better for a little while
I try to be strong
But it's really just pretend
I'm hurt and lonely wishing it would end
I can hear momma crying
On the other side of the door
Hear her heart breaking
There cant be too many pieces left anymore
I tell her to move on but not with another man
I can't bear the thought of being here again
Pappa doesn't understand
When he walks out the door he's not really just a man
He's still my pappa but I sit and pretend
It doesn't matter if he never wants to see me again
He's my Daddy
What I'll someday look for in a man
Now I wonder
Would he let a man like him take my hand
I can't beat the thought of being her someday
Daddy when you came back why didn't you stay
Why do you leave me alone and feeling blue
Daddy don't you know I need and love you too

Pretty words

I hear your pretty words
But you've already shown me your heart
Black as onyx on a midnight moonless sky
Take your empty promises
To the brothel down the lane
I know your kind
So I'll keep on walking
Just the same.

Wednesday, March 12, 2014

Sea gull in the City

A seagull in the city
Such a silly sight
Wings to fly away
Yet seemingly unaware of its plight.

Hints of ocean linger
Where the seagull walks about
Yet concrete is its pathway
A french fry in its mouth.

Silly little sea gull
Don't you know your name?
Look around
This life isn't the same.

The salt you crave is wild
The sea spray on your back
The world in which your standing
Will leave you lonely and fat.

Spread your wings while you can
I long to fly beside you.
Hurry now and go.
Before you feel lost and trapped
Like I do.

Look deeper

She's a basket full of contradictions
Wrapped in cellophane of indifference
Sealed with a bow of insecurities
But buried deep inside that basket
Is a heart of gold
Lips that taste like hunny
And a passion for love that would make aphrodite blush.
The key, caring enough to look deeper.

Tuesday, March 4, 2014

Woman Is

Passion lingers beneath the facade of trust.
Like a flower if unnurtured it will die.
Poison the soil in which it grows and it will wither away.
A womans heart holds the keys to the world.
Unlock her passion and your life will flourish with a wealth that can be neither bought nor sold.
Let her unfurl before you.
But be cautious.
Woman is both fragile and fierce.
It is within her to guide, support, and nurture all around her.
But her soul craves nurture as well.
It is through the love she recieves she is able to give.
Hold her in awe as the sunrise.
Show her the beauty she holds within your eyes.
Be true, be kind, be strong yet weak enough to show her your greatest strength is her.
Wisdom is knowing what you have when you hold it.
Once you let it go let it move on.
The woman you failed to cherish deserves a man who never lets go.

Monday, March 3, 2014


When life shatters at your feet
Do not despair.
Select carefully the pieces
And build your masterpiece from there.
For life the grand illusion
Bittersweet hides the divine.
Let your tears fall when needed
They wash away the pain
clearing the path for better times.

Sunday, March 2, 2014

The art of seduction

Words. They seduce,inspire,captivate,wound.
To have a love affair with mind.
Capture in a sentence the essence of a beauty, a feeling,a moment in time.
Framing the sunrise its myriad of technicolors awakening like a sleepy child,first peeking from beneath its cool blue safety only to explode across it with such vibrance it illuminates the world.
The sensual command of language. Exploring,imploring,evoking emotions hidden from consciousness.
Oh the sweet ecstasy of intellectual stimulation.
The capture of the heart through the mind.
Opening of two souls by mere conversation.
True power is not in pain.
It does not dwell within a coin or a trinket.
True power is in mastery.
Commanding with such force, such sweet eloquent skill, the use of language as to capture a soul for a moment or a lifetime.
The ability to move another so deeply to the very core of thier existence they feel what you feel,see through your eyes, hear the thoughts that rumble inside your mind.
If once ,however briefly , one becomes snared in the net of your words revel in the knowledge for a brief moment in time you mastered the art.
If even just one can feel, there is hope for immortality.
If there is hope for immortality then there too is hope for love.
If only a love affair with words.

Midnight Awakens

His face haunts my mind
Dark looming.
Urgency and need.
All the emotions missing for so long.
The memory dwindles
But burns deep inside.
Sweat drenches the sheets.
My hands shake.
Fear, excitement.
Alone in darkness.
The memory of a face I dont know.
Whispers from a voice never heard.
The angel is gone.
With him hope.
The memory.
Once. Another life.
He was exquisite.
And I was loved.
Or maybe he's just lost.
Searching for me.
Hope returns again.
Will he know me?
I him?
How many lives
Do I have left to live?